Once again, I had my post all planned out, but have to change course…AGAIN. Can’t I go one dang-on day without a Small Act of Racism happening? I guess not. That’s why I started the post: to illustrate that racism, for a person of color, is like an uninvited guest that didn’t call first who plops down on your living room couch announces that they’re moving in and won’t get out even with an eviction notice. It ain’t for lack of trying to have a racism free day. It just doesn’t work that way, but at least today it wasn’t directed at me. Thank God! Cuz I am still good and pissed about yesterday’s encounter.

I love the Twitterverse and I began following Jameela Jamil from The Good Place several months ago. She is a body positivity advocate and takes no BS! I adore her! Ms. Jamil is a British actress of Indian (from India) and Pakistani descent. Apparently, earlier today a Twitter Troll attempted to throw her under the bus by making a Good Place reference after an actress may not have responded appropriately regarding the country of India’s policies regarding the Kashmiri region under their control. I have not been able to find the comment, most likely because Jameela Jamil HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT! 

The actress the troll was attempting to drag was Priyanka Chopra-Jonas, an Indian actress with a storied Bollywood career and star of Quantico here in the states. NOT THE SAME PERSON. From what I can tell, as I am a fan of both, all they have in common is a partially shared ancestry. Priyanka Chopra measures in at a whopping 5’5” while Jameela Jamil is 5’10”. Ms. Chopra has a squarish face while Ms. Jamil has a longer rounder face. Ms. Jamil has a British accent. To me they look and sound nothing alike. They are, however, both insanely gorgeous! So, I guess they have that in common as well. 

The person who made the mistake did apologize and please note how he didn’t try to make up an excuse. 

Well, why is confusing two actresses of similar descent racist? Because it goes back to the old trope of “they all look alike.” Take for instance my son’s post about being put in handcuffs in front of my house. 

In case you have forgotten, my son came home late one evening after work and was settling in to eat when he noticed bright lights trained on the house. He went outside to investigate and was directed to put his hands up and get down on his knees. He heard, “yeah that’s him.” There were 8 police officers, at least one police dog, and 8 guns trained on him. He almost made the fatal mistake of reaching into his pocket to get his I.D., but stopped himself just in time for fear of being shot to death. They handcuffed him against one of the cars and once again, he heard, “yeah that’s him.” Problem is that wasn’t the person they were looking for. The person they were looking for is at least 5 inches shorter than my son, approximately 75 pounds lighter and dark skinned (think dark chocolate) while my son is described as light-skinned (think caramel). The only two things they had in common? The hairstyle of having dreads. When the ordeal was over and as an officer was taking off the cuffs, he said, “Black guy with dreads. You understand, right?” WHAT THE FUCK?! 

My son came back into my house, dropped to his knees and began sobbing and wailing. No one has the right to traumatize my child because they think “they all look alike.” Trust and believe, had they killed my son, HELL HATH NO FURY LIKE A MARQUESS WOMAN SCORNED! I am glad for all parties that my son lived to tell the tale. 

A White co-worker attempted to tell me about an African-American man once and I was confused. I said, “okay, is he light-skinned, dark-skinned, what?” She said, “I don’t do all that light-skinned stuff.” I was offended and we did eventually talk about it. Here’s the deal: it is okay to use descriptors to describe people of color in the same way that you would describe someone as blonde with blue eyes. We don’t all look alike. Really. We don’t.