Small Acts of Racism: Act 1

I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
~Maya Angelou

This is the first post on my new blog. I’m just getting this new blog going, so stay tuned for more. Subscribe below to get notified when I post new updates.

Act 3: For Real Though? You Can’t See All of This?

Small Acts of Racism

#smallactsofracism

Act 3: The responses to my first two posts have been interesting, mostly because of white people responding by stating that this happens all the time, “it is just rudeness.” Hopefully, this post will better illustrate what I mean. Let me set the stage: Take a look at the picture below and think about why Ava DuVernay named her documentary, “When They See Us.” There is a meaning in the title, in and of itself, that I would bet every Black person implicitly understands.

On an extremely hot day in July of 2019, I was at a baseball game. In fact, I wrote my first post while at the game when a similar incident occurred yet again. I was set up in my chair with my umbrella as shown below. I purposely sat in the back, so my umbrella wouldn’t obstruct any views. When I initially sat down I positioned myself behind two people whom I could see between. I also purposefully sat behind a pillar, so no one would be inclined to sit in front of me (besides the fact that they would have to squeeze between two people to see). Also, please remember, I am no longer the slip of a girl I was  in high school. I am a sizable Black woman.

Nonetheless, a man came up and positioned himself directly in front of me. He didn’t look at me and didn’t acknowledge my presence. He did ask the white woman seated down from me if he was obstructing her view, but still said nothing to me. You will notice her dog in the shot because he took up residence near me. I said nothing, just to see how this would play out. The coach began yelling at the umpire and I made a joke about the coach rushing the plate which those surrounding me laughed about. At that moment, the man turned around with a startle, genuinely surprised to see me sitting there. I mean the look on his face was one of genuine surprise. He literally didn’t see me sitting there when he arrived and acknowledged the white woman down from me.

Now giving credit where credit is due, once he noticed me, he did ask me if he was in my way. The original people had moved, so I scooted down a bit. This scenario then played out with a young white woman, a middle aged white man and a middle aged white woman. A total of three additional times. I took pics, but will not post them for their privacy.

There is a difference between rude people being rude and NOT BEING SEEN AT ALL. A person cannot choose to be rude to you, if they literally don’t see you.

Now, think about how this affects people of color everyday. If we are not seen, how does that affect customer service, hiring practices, educational opportunities and healthcare? (Just to name a few.)

#smallactsofracism

This blog originally started as a 30 day experiment on my part to see if my perception regarding racism was accurate. I felt like I was dealing with it every single day in the smallest of ways. I personally routinely engage in Small Acts of Kindness and Love on a regular basis to complete strangers. However, my daily life was telling me that I was far more likely to experience something that looked and smelled like racism from a stranger before anyone, stranger and familiars alike, would act kindly or lovingly toward me. I wrote a post on FaceBook everyday for 30 days. I was actually surprised that I got to day 30. Surely, I thought when I started, I was making a mountain out of a molehill. I think questioning your experiences surrounding racism is common among people of color just as a survival tactic. Who in their right mind could possibly deal with that much racism ALL THE TIME? It seems that it would certainly make someone crazy. After 30 days and many more, I can say that I think I am as sane now as I was then. Thus, in reading my blog, you may sometimes feel as though you missed something. You’re not crazy. You did. I am merely making the posts that started on FaceBook available to a wider audience, but have left them largely untouched. I have changed names to protect my FB friends.

The rhetoric around race has grown increasingly hostile over the last few years. However, I have purposefully chosen not to discuss the current United States administration because race and racism have always been an ever present part of the structure of America and my American life. Just because there is a bigot in office who is making it more noticeable, doesn’t mean it hasn’t always been there. It is just back in the forefront, but there was never a post-racial America as people would want Americans of color to believe. Racism has morphed in it’s manifestations over 500 years. Just because slavery ended, doesn’t mean that racism did. The same is true for the election of a Black president. Just because we elected a brown person to lead the free world, does not mean that racism in this country ended. It just looked different. Now, it just looks more like it did before the Civil Rights Movement and it will look different in ten more years. It is the nature of this great experiment.

What is racism? To make sure we are all on the same page, for the purposes of this blog the following definition will be used:

Race Prejudice + Power = Racism

As you will see, race prejudice is not just the disliking of people of color because they are “of color.” Although, this definition certainly encompasses the concept of disliking people because of the color of their skin. Race prejudice is far more complex and nuanced than simple displeasure or aversion. These days I hear people also refer to this as “unconscious bias.” The first definition that pops up is “the belief or adherence to stereotypes of people that is outside of one’s conscious thought.” Everyone has some unconscious bias; however, adding power to that unconscious bias moves the needle from race prejudice to racism.

Power in this instance can come in all different shapes and sizes, from individual acts of racism to systemic and systematic racism. This answers one of the questions I get a lot in response to my writings and musings about race: Can Black people be racist? The short answer is many Black people hold anti-white prejudice and are vehement bigots. The long answer is more complex. The second question I get is: Are all white people racist? The short answer is no, not all white people are racist bigots. The long answer is more complex.

Why is it important to define racism for what it is? I would think that this is an obvious answer, but in truth, it has not been. Thus far in my experience, I have found that when white people are left to define racism, it almost always absolves them, and every white person they know…or know of…and every white person in this country…and any white person in the world of any guilt regarding racism. Furthermore, when white people can convince people of color that their definition, which essentially defines only race prejudice without an acknowledgement of power, is the true and only one, then they can convince people of color that racism is their imagination or that ALL people are prejudiced. If people of color insist that racism is real and trot out concrete evidence, then corresponding white people will state they have no power to stop or prevent it because it is ethereally systemic and they have no power in said system. It is outside of their locus of control. I believe that most people who engage in this behavior believe themselves to be genuine. However, in essence they are gaslighting people of color into believing that racism isn’t an issue nor does it have the purported impact people of color of say it has. Nothing to see here….move along.

Well, I’m not in the mood to move along. Ignoring racism is more work than accepting it for what it is and working to try and improve my existence and the existence of the people that I love and serve.